Divorce sucks period, divorcing with a kid involved is pure hell. I will touch on that topic in a minute. Pretty boring today she & I were as civil as we are going to be right now, nothing to exciting at work, although for the first time in months I ate so much at lunch I actually had a bellyache and was ready to just lay down and take a nap. I hadn’t had that feeling after eating in a hell of a long time.
After work I finally got to see my daughter, I don’t know who was more excited we were out the door of her parents and off to our new house. No sooner then we get home she takes of her shoes and socks and just starts bouncing around, says she doesn’t want to get carpet dirty. She was super excited to watch the big TV hanging up on the wall. So I let her do that while I made dinner, when she came in and saw what all we were having she was super duper excited. After that is where it all goes downhill, because someone else namely her mother has taken this to the gutter. So as we were talking about what she has been doing and school, she stops and wants to tell me something. I was like sure what it is, “mommy has a crush on some guy (name withheld)” I was like really, and asked her a couple of different ways to make sure it wasn’t her concocting a story as six year old’s will do. Nope no fabricated story, her mother actually said that to her, followed by a bunch of questions from my daughter on who I have a crush on. She even asked me if I was ever going to get remarried, I was like did your mom say that?!?! She didn’t , thank god, but everything my lawyer has said, everything I’ve read, just everything in general putting that kind of shit in her head is beyond damaging. She knows we are getting divorced and now living in two different homes, her view right now is nobody else buy mommy and daddy, and believe me my daughter isn’t dumb. She is my mini me and she will do her own snooping with her words until she gets the answer she desires. Actually she has her mother figured out already, she hasn’t figured or know the “why” part of it, but the last two times I’ve had her she’s manipulated her questions to pin my wife in a corner and have to flat out lie to her own daughter to save her own ass. It is quite comical to see her at work. Hell she busted her tonight at bed time, saw right through a bullshit answer on the phone, it was beautiful to see I think my wife actually heard me from the kitchen cracking up saying that’s my girl! (She talks to each of us on speaker phone, she likes it) So after that incredibly awkward moment, where for once in my life I took the high road for the greater good (I actually am learning took 37 years), I was pretty frigging pissed the rest of the night. At least up until bed time when, my daughter confirmed what I already knew, she was out of town again. On a Wednesday no less, that part didn’t bother me at all, the fact she has now gone this route with our child is what really pisses me off. Three months ago I would have played right along, now I’m staying above the fray on this. I’m not letting her get harmed in this anymore than she already will be, one thing I’ve learned and I can’t wait for that day to come, when she gets older and realizes everything that has happened it isn’t me she will blame. That day is a long way off, but when it comes I’m going to probably buy her a pony that day!
After dinner we biked all the way to her school, thankfully plenty of sidewalks, and made the 3/4 of mile trip without a hassle. I had to speed walk to keep up, but exercise is good, once we got there she drove around the parking lot like she owned the place. It was beautiful to see, her just honking her horn and screaming at the top of her lungs, not a care in the world. Man I wish I was six again!
That’s about all I got for tonight, lot to chew on, and right now it’s purely over the fact she just dragged our daughter into it whether she wants to believe it or not. I was told by her (the wife) before she even told me she wanted a divorce that life isn’t fair. She’s right it’s not, so when her daughter resents her so many years down the road I’ll be sure to mention it to her!