The X-Files

After tonight there might be a bit of a chink in the armor with Miss Madison.  I finally figured out why she has been so nice and accommodating with me.  It’s not my George Clooney looks or Stephen Hawking intelligence (which I possess neither but don’t tell her that), it’s not my propensity for watching Jeopardy with her and groaning every time I see French hick towns as a category (she spent six months there), no it’s because she thinks I have super human strength!  I don’t but she must have read the wrong online  profile before we met in person.

Why do I say this?  Because not only does she handle adolescent teenagers all day while teaching, she is also the student council sponsor at her middle school.  I don’t know how student council rolls in everyone else’s neck of the woods, but around here they are responsible for putting on school dances.  The same dances all of us attended at the ripe age of 13-14 with enough acne on our faces to double as a scarecrow at a Nebraska farm and perfecting the super romantic “box” style of dancing. Being the sponsor also means being in charge of supplies and refreshments.  As much as I love my new little city of Madison, this isn’t Kansas anymore for me, options are a tad more limited around here for your shopping needs and that means……a freaking Walmart trip for this Friday’s “Summer in Winter” pubescent school dance.

Back to the super human strength point:  48 two liters of soft drinks (that’s soooooda for you northerners), 10 lbs. of potato chips, cookies, party favors, and duct tape(???) is what our mission consisted of.  Push a frigging grocery cart with 48 two liters and get back to me, not to mention it had a bum wheel that was in desperate need of an alignment!  I about took out a wine display and a little kid picking his nose.  Bonus points to the Ripley County (I live in Jefferson County) sheriff who was ripping his pre-adolescent son in the parking lot.  He was Sloane’s age or younger and was getting called a jack ass by his father in the parking lot at a voice that they probably heard all the way in outer space.  He was off duty, but that pretty black Dodge Charger that said “Ripley County Sheriff’s Department” kind of blew his disguise.  Walmart baby!

The cart was like pushing a freaking elephant!

Duct tape, who knew Walmart had so many selections!

I mentioned yesterday day about Sloane and our bike riding excursion and how troubling it was for me.  The bottom line she was lied to.  She thought she did right, she thought she did everything her parents (at least me) had ever tried to instill in her and tell the truth.  Bless her heart she thought she let her dad down by telling the truth.  Sloane had an interview last fall that pretty much determined her fate.  It’s shitty pressure to put on any kid at that age but she didn’t have a choice.  She was told to tell the truth and everything would work out.  She did tell the truth, she wanted to live with her dad!

What has bothered her since she had to be relocated against her wishes is because at the time I was living at an apartment.  In her interview she mentioned I live in an apartment and others live in a house.  She thinks this is why she didn’t get to live with me after judgement was ruled, never mind the fact she was basically bribed that she had her own bathroom at her Kane-Tucky residence.  She was damn near in tears, feeling she let me down because at that time I lived in an apartment.  She’s only eight years old and gets to choose between having her own bathroom or living in an apartment and told the interviewer she still wanted to live with me!  Hopefully she never has to learn that the family court system motto is “Ye who has the most money”, but she feels betrayed.  Evidently the latest ploy from the “Evil Empire” is the promise to move to Florida after she turns 12 and gets to decide for herself.

If that previous paragraph gets me in more trouble I don’t really care.  My daughter has been screwed over time and time again since June of 2014 and from the looks of it is going to continue to get screwed over until she has a chance make her own decisions!  I only moved to Madison, IN after I knew she was going to be relocated.  If it went in my favor then I would still be in vacation destination New Albany, IN and figuring out a way to keep Sloane at her old school.

O.K. tangent over, some good news today is my service award arrived.  I’ve already given it a name of Smoking Sammy (I’m open for suggestions for a better name) and while assembling it I was more excited than a 16 year old boy with a Penthouse magazine!  I envision a beautiful relationship between the two of us.  I had no idea it was this large, I’ve owned a smoker before, but it was a midget compared to this behemoth!  I think this weekend it’s going to be a pork butt or ribs and it will be the start of a love affair.

About it for tonight, I’m currently looking up loopholes in Indiana law and figuring out a way to rescue my daughter.  Bottom line is she nor did I ever choose this life for her, her resolve through all of it makes me smile ear to ear to be her father.  No matter what happens in the future NOBODY can take away that I am her dad.  Before it is all said and done I will expose the “system” for it being nothing more than a cash grab and never in the best interest of the child!  If that wasn’t the case I would have already tucked Sloane in bed this evening!

I offer bribes for your vote!

Send Skipah Sailing!


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  5. It will eventually just a matter of getting there :(.

  6. I hope it works out before too much damage is done

  7. Thanks for the tip, yeah everything about it sucks!

  8. HI ya I am so sorry about Sloane. I am not sure if you have tried them, but there is a charity in your neck of the woods (I think) that deals with this sort of thing. Called Menstuff, if you haven’t be worth checking them out

  9. Miss Madison just kicked my in the nuts to not type how I really feel :). Common sense checked out a long long time ago!

  10. Why? Just why do they put her through this? Your poor daughter is being tormented with guilt. Doesn’t her other family see that? Why wouldn’t they want to keep the peace? If she must live there then let her see you more!!!

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  12. Entire shopping cart of toilet paper would definitely be a red flag for me about the impending zombie apocalypse!

  13. It always amuses me when you see the people with shopping carts containing 50 bottles of coke and 300 paper towels, because you always think must be a party or a dance, etc, and then you think ‘but what if it’s not??’ My sister once got freaked out by a man with an entire shopping cart of toilet paper - she thought he knew something about the apocalypse that she didn’t & was stocking his nuclear bunker! I told her he was still going to die in a nuclear bunker full of toilet roll as it’s not very nutritious.

  14. Smoking Sammy will be “earning” his keep this weekend :), I’m at a loss for words on the court system. The kid is smarter than some adults I know but her opinion doesn’t mean shit!

  15. That’s a lot of Pop (we Brits like simple words lol) to push around!

    Poor Sloane, that’s heartbreaking! I sure do hope you find that loop hole, I hate how its a money thing that is the main concern for the court system and not for the child. If she’s stated she’d rather live with Daddy then surely that’s what she should get!

    Now Smoking Sammy is quite the beast!!!

  16. Isn’t that the freaking truth!

  17. Poor thing. What a heavy load to carry.

  18. C.S. I’m feeling so generous I’ll even cover the shipping charges!

  19. Wow that looks real heavy! And you will find a loophole, Gary, for sure!
    PS: When is that smoked meat getting ready? Ship some to the old continent, will ya?

  20. Will do thanks for popping in 🙂

  21. I love stopping by to catch up on all of your doings. Send Sloane some hugs for me!

  22. Hmm I will have to get the IT department on that pronto! I can’t be losing my California delegation due to technical problems!

  23. The smoker is getting a workout this weekend as for the other stuff time will take care of it :).

  24. Ha.. you know, Gary, I have the hardest time with your site. My computer always, always, glitches out and it take effort of clicking on a post…it gets like a white film over the screen…I exit out…click again… then it spins forever when I’m at your site and click again for a specific post or to “read more” Sometimes, I have to exit out and reenter again.

    I’m not kidding, I always have difficulty with your site that’s why I haven’t been commenting lately because sometimes, I get so frustrated.

    So yesterday, after exiting a couple of times and reentering… my computer or internet decided to act up and did that DELAY typing thing. I’d type two characters and then it would eventually show… I almost gave up. Typically, I would scroll back up to ensure names are spelled correctly (:) but… I wanted to try to get the comment in! Wanted you to know I was still trying to read your site!

    I thought it might be my computer/internet connection…but I never have any issues with other sites (just yours)

    Is Sloane’s (notice E) mom messing with that? _ see, even right now, when I click “send” to send you this comment, the computer just “spins and spins” - I had to try again and I got a message that MESSAGE FAILED. (that’s never happened before)

    So Here I am directly at your site - trying one more time.

  25. I love the smoker. Keep speaking up about the court system. You are truly encouraging others. Keep your head up!

  26. I took a couple of cycles of steroids to manage but I did it :).

  27. I impressed that you could push a grocery cart containing 48 two liter bottles of soft drinks plus all that other stuff. In fact, I’m even impressed that you managed to lift 48 two liter bottles into the cart. I’m sure I’d have stopped at about six.

  28. Thank you, everything about the Sloane situation sucks. I’ll let you get by with forgetting the E, once her mom reads this though I can’t protect you from her. You need to seek legal counsel immediately!

  29. There is going to be some serious food porn coming up in the near future. This thing is massive, as for the other thing to quote Miss Madison “Move the eff on already and leave me alone”, I may need to borrow Avery soon for her “light socket hair look” to sway some people!

  30. The smoker looks amazing!… no wonder you were excited. Sorry about Sloan.

  31. It also takes strength (or is it stupidity?) to even enter into a place a like Walmart. Don’t worry, I’ve pulled the “stupid card” many times and fear I’ll do it again….many times.

    Hope you find that loophole, Sloane deserves to be with her caring and attentive father; end of story! Now, go smoke some meat and send some down to Texas!

Tell Skipah all about it!