You know what hurts more than anything? Using the bridge of your nose to break a fall after tripping on something in your kitchen, and the kitchen table politely agrees to catch you before you can get your hands out in front of you. I thought I had broken my nose (and I have a lot of nose). Luckily, it just looks like I took direct fire from a slingshot and ball bearings. That’s how my weekend got started out Saturday morning. It’s been…..interesting.
For all the devious things Sloane did to Hammy Thursday and Friday, she felt some bit of compassion for him and talked me into letting her upgrade his two-bunk Hilton into a super, three-story penthouse. I tried to explain that another flight of stairs in his home would only encourage him to train harder, but it’s her pet, and it was her money, so you’re welcome Hammy. Secretly, I think he left cord out that I tripped on. After Sloane went to bed, though, I let him have some vodka, and he and I were knocking back White Russians while watching the UK-Notre Dame game. Wow, what a game! By the end Hammy was saying Hail Mary’s, reciting the holy trinity, vowing to defect anything for his new team, the Irish, to pull out the win. After the game was over, he claimed the fix was in, and I reminded him his country knew all about the fix as well as anyone, i.e. 1972 Summer Olympics in basketball. After basketball, I let him set up his own online dating profile on Hothamsters.com. Yes, even double agent hamster spies have needs.
Since my employer requires my services a little earlier than normal tomorrow, I relinquished the blonde bomber to the nursing home so she could get max sleep on her first day back at school. I look out for the best interests of my child even at the cost of parenting time with her. Our weekend was a blast, though! Plenty of Nerf hoops, uplifting and disturbing conversation (ten kids REALLY), indoor beach ball kickball (don’t ask), and just spending time with her in general. My little girl is amazing! We did a product review yesterday for littlemissmatched.com. Sure, it was only a set (not a pair) of socks, but watching her bounce around thinking she was getting ready to sell a billion socks and make her dad a millionaire was priceless. Since softball practice got moved up today, and she already had plans, she missed softball practice. I gave her the choice, and she wanted her “Girls Day” with some friends of hers from her early days. She went to see Cinderella and told me I wasn’t allowed, which worked out great. I got my school work done, and afterward she and I had dinner at her favorite restaurant. I’m going to miss these weekends because that oath of I’m declaring war is here.
Guess who is getting dragged back to court? This guy that’s who, why you may ask? Because somebody that claims she doesn’t care what anybody thinks about her apparently isn’t nearly as thick-skinned as she portrays herself to be. This and this are getting me dragged back to court. If I only know you from being a loyal reader, please tell me the name of who I am talking about? You have no idea other than it’s my daughter’s future stepdad who is a shitty parent and been divorced FOUR times. You don’t know anything else about him! If I know you personally or through social media, guess what it’s my f!cking story, and I can tell it to whomever I want. So let’s go back to court you useless mother that has missed two softball practices and left another one early (my reason was viable we already had plans, and it got changed at 10:30 last night), PTO vice president who hasn’t done one damn thing with it since last fall, brownie troop leader who lied through her teeth last fall, mom that wants to pull her daughter out of her current school, so she can move to BFE Kentucky. Your lies have caught up to you; your deceit is over; your outed! I’m ashamed to even have been married to you for 13 years, but I’ll own it!
Let’s go to court AGAIN; hopefully, the judge will take a common sense approach, but either way, I haven’t done one frigging thing that is harmful in regards to our daughter! You aren’t getting the custody back that you gave me, that YOU NEEDED to cede to go play in the land of goats and outhouses. Intimidate me with your $250.00 an hour mouthpiece; get over me already and quit waiting to read whatever literary magic I type out every night. Go live your life; you chose this way back when not me. I adapted.
I went through a lot to get to where I am now, but guess what I made it through! Yeah, I had to drop our daughter off at your parents tonight without you there because you can’t drive your company issued vehicle back home tonight without getting in trouble. Had a long talk with your father after he welcomed me in. You’ve put him through more hell than you put me through - job well done! You are the epitome of evil, and you don’t get to take my daughter out of this area. So let’s just keep going back to court; you lost, and you can try to bankrupt me all you want, but you still lost. You lost the respect of your parents, your colleagues, and you are working on losing the respect of the one person that should mean the most, your daughter. Send this post to your lawyer because I’ve got a zillion more showing what a selfish parent you are. By the way, why don’t you get her a bed; she’s only slept on the couch since July with you! Why don’t you get the smell of cat piss out of her “bedroom” also. Yeah, I called CPS after the divorce, and for some reason they gave you a 24-hour notice, and you and your family turned into a Merry Maids crisis team to gussy it up. You want the pictures I got today while talking to your father to go live? You always forgot that I’m smarter than you, and since June I only look out for one female in my life, and her name is Sloane! I suggest you do the same!